Despoiling Harry

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The characters and the situations within these fanfiction stories are not my property. They are the property of J.K. Rowling, Warner Brothers, and others, and are used without permission. No profit is being made from the use of these characters and situations; these written-down imaginings are only presented in an internet forum for the interest of and consumption by the like-minded individuals who enjoy them and recognize them as unauthorized fanfiction only, and are not in any way meant to be confused with the originals NOR presented as authorized materials of these owners.

But Which Part?
by Amanuensis


Pairing: The pairing is the punchline.
Categories: Humor
Notes: For the pervy_werewolf Mini-Challenge: "Bertie Bott's Every Flavor Beans used as a sex toy."


***


"If you force me to participate--" Snape, the bastard, managed to sound threatening even while remaining firmly ensconced behind his book--"you shall regret it, Potter."

Harry stood his ground. From across the room, Dumbledore was watching him, and his suggestion that Harry engage Snape in the Hallowe'en festivities had been no less than a veiled command.

So he would do it, dammit.

"Take one," he said, as angrily as he dared while still pitching his voice low. "It's a game. Dumbledore wants you to. He took one, and he hates them. Take one of the bloody things--" he pushed the bowl of Every Flavor Beans against Snape's arm, which caused him to lower the book at last, face as disapproving as if Harry were offering him a bowl of slug guts-- "and tell what flavor you got, and let the rest of us get on with the sodding game and the sodding evening."

Snape slapped the book closed. Harry, seeing his face, almost lost his nerve.

And then Snape did something that made it worse.

He smiled.

Reached out, took a bean. Harry watched with a rising feeling of terror as Snape placed it on his tongue, and chewed and swallowed with the deliberation of a monarch's toady checking for poison, the smile never completely leaving his face.

And then pronounced: "Remus Lupin."

Behind him, Harry heard more than one person choke on their drinks. He was sure Remus was one of them.

He damn well hoped Dumbledore was, too.


***

-fin


Despoiling Harry

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amanuensis1 @ earthlink . net